Getting away with a spank or two is generally considered normal in the bedroom, but if you’ve been finding yourself wanting more, you might have a thing for impact play. Rightfully so, too—no other kink can make the body feel so alive. In impact play, bodily sensations are heightened with every touch, which makes orgasm no less extraordinary during these sessions.
Impact play is usually used as punishment or discipline, which lends itself a bad reputation in the vanilla community. The whole arrangement sounds extreme, even borderline masochistic. But impact play can actually be gentle when you want it to be. It can span from soft tapping to hard smacking, depending on the informed consent provided beforehand.
What’s the Big Deal with Impact Play, Anyway?
For one, a hit to the erogenous zones will stimulate the nerve receptors underneath it, which emits endorphins and dopamines: the feel-good hormones!
Impact play doesn’t just benefit the submissive, either. The dominant can find a great deal of release with the right force used to hit a person. We’re talking about being spanked, punched, whipped, or flogged for sexual gratification here. If there’s a time to let loose in BDSM, it’s during impact play.
Where to Hit and What to Expect
Generally, there are two kinds of sensations you can feel in impact play: “thuddy” and “stingy.” The kind of implement used will be the determining factor as to what sensation will be felt. Kink educator Lateef Taylor gave this rule of thumb to remember: the wider the implement is and the bigger the area struck, the thuddier the impact.
That said, which body part would be safe to strike?
It’s best to target areas that have the most fat and muscle, like ass cheeks and outer thighs. The more fat in them, the less likely it will hurt.
This information must be known by both parties before the start of a session. Otherwise, you risk both your safety. If you play it too rough, receiving hits and blows to critical areas might put the submissive at risk of losing blood circulation, hitting nerve endings, and causing internal damages.
Body Safety Measures
Here’s a quick guide on body safety, but make sure to do more research beyond this:
- Safe zone: buttocks, leg, outer thighs, flat palm, and forearm
- Risk zone: genitals, breasts, upper arm, calves, and inner thighs
- Danger zone: face, feet, fingers, and hips
- Critical zone: ears, lower back, stomach, hips, spine, tailbone, and neck
Focusing too much on certain parts of the body can also cause more damage than intended. For instance, leather butt is a term for a toughening of the skin—almost like a callus—that occurs from repeated or severe spankings.
In worst cases, it may mean nerve damage from hard beatings. This results in the loss of sensitivity if dealt with too harshly, which is just a lose-lose scenario for everyone.
Another example is that hitting the breasts can cause cysts to form. That said, make sure to mix things up and spread out areas to hit. No picking of favorite body parts!
Take into account the submissive’s pain tolerance as well. A safe word is especially important in an arrangement like this since too much pain at the wrong place and time could possibly lead to broken bones or impacted nerves.
Intimacy-wise, the existence of a safe word can also protect you and your partner from the lost trust that arises from overstepped boundaries.
Here are other things to know about and communicate with your sexual partner beforehand:
- Do you bruise easily?
- Any medical concerns to take note of?
- Do you want to be marked?
- Where do you want to be hit?
- Is this more a physical or sexual experience for you?
Sex Toys: The Heart of Impact Play
As already established, impact play is anything that involves striking a body part—a face, an arm, a thigh, a back. Padding, caning, and cropping are the most common implements of impact play. Impact play doesn’t necessitate the use of sex toys, but incorporating a few in the picture can really serve as a game-changer.
Simple accessories like blindfolds are also often paired with impact play toys—and for good reason. Even the most vanilla people have a blindfold or two under drawers, so think of it as a free bargain! Not knowing when to anticipate that next smack can really send your whole body into an ultra-sensitive mode, heightening your senses in a way that you’ve never experienced before.
1. Riding Crop
Everybody loves the classic riding crop. It’s one of the first toys that come to mind when thinking of impact play. How could it not? The riding crop is a great tool for establishing power dynamics—it could easily command authority and add excitement to your sessions with your sub.
Adding in that layer of being disciplined like an animal, the riding crop can certainly invoke complex emotions such as humiliation, thrill, and release in a single swing of a whip.
For those who want to go beyond spanking their subs, the next interesting level would be introducing the sharp stabs of pain the riding crop can give. To get started, consider a few features of the riding crop. If you’re open to spicing things with a different pain quality, then a crop with a sharper tip can satisfy that itch.
Another thing is to know the flexibility of the tip. If the tip is flimsy, it can bend when you’re swinging the crop, thus adding more momentum and heightened pain. Lastly, you should also consider the pole connecting the tip. Just like tip flexibility, a bendier pole can impact the momentum of the strike, leading to more pain.
2. Paddle
The paddle is another common tool in impact play. Paddles are what you easily expect—it’s wooden or leather with two flat sides.
It used to be a common punishment tool for misbehaving students, often aimed at the buttocks or the back of the thighs. Now, it’s safe to assume that paddles are off the schools and safer within the bounds of safe, sane, and consensual. Though, of course, if you’re open to a little bit of roleplaying, the paddle can easily make you feel like a student needing a little bit of extra credit.
Unlike other toys, paddles are under the “thuddy” feeling, so you’re less likely to imprint any bruises on your partner’s skin. This leaves you with a dull pain akin to spanking, but of course this all depends on the material and quality of your paddle.
As with other toys, the typical wooden or leather paddle may be a bit too much for beginners. It’s recommended that you begin with faux leather or plastic cores to soften the blow. Less flexible paddle cores with smaller sizes often leave a more painful impact. As always, know your preference and test your limits when considering the paddle for you.
3. Slapper
The slapper is somewhat similar to a paddle, except it’s double the trouble. It’s usually a wooden paddle with two layers wrapped in leather that creates an echo of a slap each time it hits a body part.
It’s usually a good implement to use for beginners given its less intimidating look and feel. Some might even say the slapper reminds them of a childhood toy.
Its smaller size makes it easier to control where exactly the slapper lands, too. The extra slap from the second layer makes for a unique sensation that other implements can’t mimic. The best part? Most slappers on the market come in handy—literally!
It becomes more of a portable accessory to carry around in a handbag rather than a bulky implement meant to be hidden under the drawers at home.
4. Flogger
The use of floggers is often associated with religious penance, which is great to incorporate as bedroom punishments or times where the purging of sins is necessary to keep the BDSM relationship moving forward.
You’ll find most floggers are multi-tailed, which separates itself from the more straightforward riding crop. Cheaper floggers lean on the softer and more flexible side of its tails, which might not have much impact on the body at all.
If you’re after the stringy sensation, opt for floggers with stiff and narrow tails instead of ones cut in wide strips. In the most extreme cases where physical pain is intended, some floggers would have small metal balls or spikes attached to the end of the tails.
Once you’ve grown familiar with the feeling of a flogger against your skin, it’s time to experiment with other assorted materials. Floggers come in leather, latex, or rubber, and each material provides a slightly different sensation than the other.
A rookie’s mistake would be getting right into flogging out of excitement. Instead, take the time to tease your partner by drawing the long tails across their body to prepare them for what’s to come.
The Best Impact Play Toys On The Market
If you’re new to impact play or you’re an established dominatrix looking to expand your sex toy collection, this part of the article is for you! Fortunately for us, shopping for an impact play toy has never been easier, so make sure to take advantage of the 21st century wonder that is the internet.
1. Black and Gold Finger Floggers by Firebird Leather
The best things in life come in pairs. This beautiful set will make you feel like you’re in the elite group in ancient Greek! At 18 inches long, the tails are of leather coated in black and gold shimmers—what more can you ask for?
According to Firebird Leather, the flogger is made with calfskin suede that has a smooth finish on the other side. It’s also made in mind with the perfect balance between a thud and a sting. The best part? The glitter isn’t actually glitter, so you don’t have to worry about specks flaking off during a session!
2. Rouge Leather Tasseled Riding Crop by Spectrum Botique
We can’t get enough of riding crops—and honestly, neither should you. Nothing can top black and red in sex toys. Something about that color combination makes the scene feel more passionate, more intense than usual. Here’s one that can have your session off to a good start: exactly what we had described!
This lightweight riding crop has enough sass on its tassels but is serious enough to provide a more-than-decent sting to your partner when slapped onto the body. It can also double as a tickler when used gently to tease the delicate skin. At the affordable price of $19, who wouldn’t cop this?
3. Enchanted Heart Paddle by Sportsheets
You can have the best of both worlds at the palm of your hands—just take a look at this magnificent heart paddle! Add to cart for the lovely design, check out for the two-in-one sensation it can provide. This starter paddle is the farthest thing from intimidating, which makes it perfect for those who are more after pleasure than pain.
On one side, the paddle has a faux-fur center that’s great for a spanking warm-up; on the other, the paddle has a faux suede side that provides more pain and intensity when used with full force. We say take advantage of both sides and spank your partner in an alternate fashion. You’ll thank us later.
4. Spanking Paddle from Synthetic Rope by My Personal Dungeon
If pain is what you’re looking for, pain is what you’ll get. Don’t underestimate this one—synthetic hemp rope hurts like a bitch! It’s the ultimate masochist’s test.
Upon first impression the spanking paddle feels unassuming, but it will leave you sore in a minute. One buyer called it “deceptively painful.” You don’t even have to swing hard for it to cause pain. Light tapping is enough to leave marks on your partner’s skin.
The paddle itself is 16 inches long. Because it’s made of rope, its sheer durability will last a lifetime. Appearance-wise, it easily sets itself apart from the usual leather-bound sex toys you see on the market. The coarse look makes a perfect addition to a shibari rope collection, too!
At The End Of The Day, Impact Play Is Flexible Fun
Tempting as it is to purchase these impact play toys, some people would rather be creative and resourceful, and that’s totally fine! The fun in impact play is that you’ll never run out of objects to use as makeshift implements—as long as it’s safe, of course!
Ordinary household items like a wooden spoon, a ruler, a hair brush, or a belt can work just as well without having to spend on pricier whips. However, the con of this is that other tools might break easily considering that they aren’t made for impact play.
If you’d rather not risk the injury, you can never go wrong with doing it the old-fashioned way: with bare hands. There’s nothing like the warm touch of pain and pleasure coming from your sexual partner.
Exploring what works and doesn’t work for you is what makes this kink so fascinating—there are way too many possibilities to ever get bored of it.
As with all things, practice makes perfect. With enough BDSM practice, you’ll start to feel comfortable with an impact play routine in no time. No matter what, remember that safety comes first in impact play!